Posts by Debi
Deadnaming — What Elliot Page’s Public Transition Can Teach Us
Elliot Page, an actor known for roles in Juno, X-Men films, and their current Oscar-nominated role in The Umbrella Academy, has started a flurry of online discussions after coming out as transgender. These discussions focused on the practice of “deadnaming” a transgender person. Deadnaming means referring to a person who is transgender by the name they used before they transitioned. Not everyone likes that terms, so you might also hear it called (and you can say instead) their “birth name,” “given name,” or “former name.” When we know that someone has transitioned, it can be a mental challenge at first to adhere to a trans...
Read MorePSA for Parents Navigating their First Holidays with a Transgender Child
A lot of folks start decorating for the holidays around Thanksgiving, so it’s a good time to take stock of what those decorations are now before any kids are involved…especially if this is your *first* year since your child has come out as transgender. Think about any personalized decorations you have that might be very gendered or have the birth name on it…stockings, handmade ornaments from preschool with the name painted on the back, an ornament-of-the-year of a football player before you knew Steven as Stephanie or of a girl in pigtails holding a teddybear before you new Stephanie as Stephen… Ask your child in a separate conversation *before*...
Read MoreTrans-Parenting Podcast Episode 9: An Interview with Darlene Tando, LCSW
https://traffic.libsyn.com/transparenting/TransParenting_Podcast_E9.mp3Podcast: Play in new window | Download | EmbedSubscribe: Apple Podcasts | Google Podcasts | RSSIn Episode 9 of the Trans-Parenting podcast, I sat down to chat with Darlene Tando, a licensed clinical social worker who recently appeared on the Dr. Phil show. In that episode, a mom and her teen were on to talk about the mom’s struggle accepting her daughter’s transition. Darlene is also the author of “The Conscious Parent’s Guide to Gender Identity: A Mindful Approach to Embracing Your Child’s Authentic Self,” which you can purchase on Amazon. As a reminder, we...
Read MoreTrans-Parenting Podcast Episode 8: Q&A session
https://traffic.libsyn.com/transparenting/08_TransParenting_Podcast_E8_1.mp3Podcast: Play in new window | Download | EmbedSubscribe: Apple Podcasts | Google Podcasts | RSSIn this episode, I answer questions I received during a Q&A session on Facebook, with additional questions from private messages and Twitter. Here’s the rundown: 4:40 How old are you? 5:01 How tall are you? 5:38 What do we do in places like North Carolina when we send our kids to school and don’t know if the school will support our child? 10:40 My daughter just started school yesterday and she is having problems with the other kids that she has known awhile who are now shunning her...
Read MoreTrans-Parenting Podcast Episode 7: How to Create a Trans-Inclusive School
https://traffic.libsyn.com/transparenting/TransParenting_Podcast_E7.mp3Podcast: Play in new window | Download | EmbedSubscribe: Apple Podcasts | Google Podcasts | RSSWhat should a school do to become transgender-inclusive? I recently gave the keynote address to the NEA’s GLBT Caucus during their annual dinner telling our not-so-great experience with a school and offering tips on how they could begin creating a safe and affirming space for trans and gender non-conforming students within their schools. You can read the transcript of the speech in the previous blog post, but for those who like podcasts or prefer to hear inflections of a speaker’s voice, this...
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